ย
๐ง๐ต๐ฒ ๐๐๐ผ๐ฟ๐ ๐ผ๐ณ ๐บ๐ ๐๐ผ๐ปโ๐ ๐ณ๐ฟ๐ถ๐ฒ๐ป๐ฑ โ๐๐ฎ๐ฟ๐ฟ๐.โ
I met Larry because he attended the day camp I was running at the school where I worked. Coincidentally, he lived in our neighborhood, and he and my son became friends as they were a year apart in age.
Larry would make a lot of โnoiseโ (my term for arguing or complaining) when faced with a non-preferred task. He resorted to learned helplessness to get adults to do things he could do independently. He had a propensity to be inflexible and struggled with perspective-taking (understanding how heโs coming across to others.)
Larryโs parents were wonderful people who decided not to respond to his noise or accommodate his learned helplessness or inflexibility. They required him to persevere through non-preferred tasks, no matter how much he whined or complained. Most importantly, they did so with โaffective calmnessโ (staying calm when you donโt feel calm inside).
Despite his significant learning disabilities, Larry was able to complete a two-year program at a community college. Today, Larry works for a small company that optimizes websites.
I attribute Larryโs success as a young adult to his parentโs understanding that they could not accommodate his โnoise,โ learned helplessness, or inflexibility. They did not protect him from experiencing temporary distress when something was challenging or non-preferred. They gave him ample independence when he was younger despite his learning challenges.
Larryโs parents set him up for success and to be employable, which should be every parentโs long-term goal for their child.
Many parents of kids with ADHD are not doing this because they are misled by lousy advice designed to make them feel good at the expense of helping their child reach their full potential.
Suppose you want to help your child become an independent, employable young adult who feels good about themselves. In that case, the content here, at the ADHD Dude YouTube channel and membership site, will help you reach that goal.
ADHD Dude content is designed to help you help your child achieve the same success as Larry. Learn more at
adhddude.com
