Introverts Excel as Leaders — So Why Are Quiet Women Still Left Behind?

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Too often, an introvert’s quietness can be misconstrued as rudeness, weakness, or a lack of passion.

A well-meaning manager at a previous job once lent me a book that introduced the concept of “level 5 leadership.” Described as “quiet, reserved, and even shy,” these “level 5 leaders” could be found at the helm of some of the world’s most powerful companies.

My manager’s intended message was, “Look! Introverts can be leaders, too.” I already knew introverts make great leaders. I also take offense when people assume that because I’m quiet, I must not have the confidence to see myself as a leader. But I had another issue with the concept: Every example of a “level 5” CEO in the book was a man.

In fact, the more I read about the qualities of these so-called level 5 leaders, the more I became convinced this style of leadership couldn’t work for women the way it did for men. All around me, I saw examples of smart, talented, introverted women who possessed all of the qualities of a “level 5 leader,” and they weren’t recognized for their ability as their more extroverted counterparts — and men of all temperaments — were.

Like many Millennial women, I entered the workforce in the era of “girl boss” culture — an ideal of female leadership that favors bold, sassy, unapologetic women speaking up and demanding a seat at the table. These were the women I saw advancing in their careers, being rewarded with promotions and opportunities to lead.

While I’m all for women taking on leadership roles, regardless of temperament, it got me thinking: Can quiet women really be themselves in the workplace if they want to be seen as leaders?

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The Facts About Introverted Women in Leadership

If you’re an introvert, you probably know that we possess many traits that make us well-suited to leadership. We tend to be emotionally intuitive, empathetic, observant, thoughtful, and diplomatic. We also thrive with independent tasks like planning, strategizing, and being creative — important work for anyone in a leadership role.

Despite this, there is a persistent temperament gap in leadership. Although 50 percent of the workforce identifies as introverted, 96 percent of leaders and managers are extroverts, according to a study by Deniz Ones and Stephan Dilchert.

It’s clear that, despite our strengths, introverts are still being overlooked for management opportunities — and that may be especially true for introverted women. By some estimates, women of all temperaments hold only 16 percent of leadership positions.

And those numbers — for both women and introverts — get smaller as you move up the organizational hierarchy. By early 2018, only 5 percent of CEO positions at S&P 500 companies were held by women. Ones and Dilchert’s study found that a meager 2 percent of top executives are introverts. While specific data on introverted women in leadership is hard to find, we can infer from these numbers that they make up a very small percentage.

Lynette Crane, the founder and CEO of Quiet Brilliance Consulting, calls this “the double whammy effect”: the fact that, in addition to gender discrimination, introverted women also experience bias in the form of the extrovert ideal.

“Whether we acknowledge it or not — whether our biases are conscious or implicit — we are living in [a] society that privileges the male extroverted leader: masculine, alpha, gregarious, and bold,” writes Heidi Kasevich, PhD, the Educational Director at Quiet Revolution.

Although much has been said about the strengths of introverts in the workplace, particularly in leadership positions, the reality is that quiet women are often not afforded these opportunities.

Why Aren’t More Introverted Women in Leadership Roles?

There are two possible explanations for why introverted women aren’t being promoted to management positions: bias and choice.

1. Bias in the workplace

It’s well-established that the extrovert ideal favors decisive and gregarious personalities over quiet ones. Because our perception of leadership qualities often aligns so closely with the extrovert ideal, it’s easy to understand how introverts in the workplace might be overlooked when a promotion opportunity arises.

Too often, an introvert’s quietness can be misconstrued as rudeness, weakness, or a lack of interest or passion — traits that may be especially damaging for women who want to prove they have the interpersonal skills to succeed in management.

For example, introverts naturally need more time to process information before responding to a question. When this happens, they can be misunderstood as “indecisive or less assertive,” according to Forbes — descriptors managers usually don’t look for when filling leadership roles.

Research also suggests that introverts may be overlooked because they often feel less comfortable with self-promotion. According to Carol Stewart, a coach for introverted women leaders, extroverts “receive more opportunities in the workplace because their performance is more visible. They are more likely to speak up and tell others about projects they are working on or talk about their successes and achievements.”

In other words, when compared to their more vocal, especially male, colleagues, managers might think introverted women are less engaged, have fewer ideas, and contribute less to the team, causing them to be passed over for leadership opportunities.

2. The choice not to pursue leadership

It’s also true that, because of this bias, introverted women may opt out of pursuing leadership roles altogether.

Because our society operates on an extroverted male style of leadership, introverted women have to expend energy on the job while also putting forth extra effort to combat the biases they face — which often means pretending to be extroverts. One LinkedIn poll found that 93 percent of introverted women find it challenging to show their true selves at work. This can be exhausting and quickly lead to burnout.

Similarly, while tasks like public speaking, networking, and making quick decisions may come naturally to extroverts, they can be draining for introverts. It takes extra energy for us to perform this type of work — and sometimes, we might decide the extra energy simply isn’t worth it.

“With such enormous pressures, it is no wonder that the temperamentally quiet woman may decide to retreat to the sidelines, choosing not to live a highly counter-dispositional life — or even leave prematurely as a result of burnout,” Kasevich writes for Quiet Revolution.

I experienced this firsthand at a previous job. I reached a point where my workdays were consumed by trying to figure out how to compete with my more extroverted male colleagues — an impossible task, given the biases I was up against. I became completely burnt out and exhausted, and I started to wonder why I even wanted a leadership position. If it meant constantly depleting my energy to the point where I had nothing left to give outside of work, what was the point?

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The Problem With Leadership Advice for Introverted Women

So, how can introverted women overcome these challenges and step into more positions of power? Unfortunately, most leadership advice aimed at women and girls is often the same: Speak up! Have confidence! Be that “girl boss” type! (I’m currently eating a yogurt with a pink lid advertising Girls, Inc. — open up, be bold, it says.)

I can appreciate this messaging — a healthy dose of confidence is important, and self-promotion is a necessary skill that we can all work on. But there is also some danger in it: It puts all the responsibility on introverted women, pressuring them to act in ways that don’t align with their nature — which can actually be counterproductive and even harmful to our health.

“We’re championing a one-note image of female strength and leadership, as if being like Beyonce, Sheryl Sandberg, or any other quintessential extrovert is the only way to be female and to be successful,” writes Natalie Matthews in an article for Elle. “In the process, we’re pushing introverted women to ape behavior that’s unnatural to them, like that’s what they need to do to get ahead, and to question if something is ‘wrong’ with them for being more of a think first, speak after type.”

As Matthews notes, this advice suggests that women must be outspoken to be powerful, and that a quiet woman must not be capable, confident, or strong. This is untrue, as many powerful introverted women prove, and it forces women leaders into a box. As introvert author Susan Cain wrote in an article for Psychology Today,  “In our efforts to instill confidence in young women, are we promoting an ideal of sassy outspokenness that’s just as confining as the 1950s model of docility?”

What to Do Instead

In a world that often pushes introverted women to “overcome” their natural tendencies to be successful, it can be incredibly challenging to forge your own leadership path. Here are a few things you can do to help combat the bias against introversion and prove that women of all temperaments can make great leaders:

  • Combat imposter syndrome. Let go of internalized ideas about leadership that equate it with extroversion. This is easier said than done, but it’s hard to be confident in your abilities if you believe leadership is something you’ll never truly embody. Confidence doesn’t have to mean outspokenness.
  • Embrace your introversion. Look for opportunities to express it. Try to catch yourself when you feel pressured to “act extroverted” and correct it. When possible, challenge any assumptions colleagues make about you or other introverted women on your team. Lift each other up whenever you can.
  • Find the right culture fit. If you’re in a role that exhausts you, where the only way to advance is by not being yourself, it’s okay to move on. Don’t force it. Consider seeking opportunities that allow you to grow in a way that feels natural.

Clearly, there’s still work to be done in making space for quieter voices. We need to acknowledge introverted women for the many valuable strengths they bring to the table and continue to create a world where they can be seen as powerful, capable, and confident — exactly as they are.

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