Benefits and How to Support It

Play is a vital part of childhood development, offering opportunities for learning and connection. For many children, including those on the autism spectrum, autism parallel play can be an important developmental stage.

But what exactly is parallel play, and how does it benefit autistic children?

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What is parallel play?

Parallel play is when kids play next to each other but don’t interact or play together. They might be doing similar activities, but they have no real engagement. In neurotypical children, this usually starts around two to three years old.

It’s a development milestone that eventually leads to more social play, like playing together or collaborating on games.

Parallel play and autism

Parallel play can be deeply meaningful for autistic children. It allows them to observe, learn, and engage with their environment at their own pace without the pressure of direct social interaction.

Children with autism often exhibit traits that naturally align with parallel play. For instance, many have a preference for structured or repetitive activities.

In a parallel play setting, a child might focus on building blocks or sorting toys while another child engages in a similar activity nearby. This shared but independent play offers opportunities for connection and learning while respecting their need for personal space.

A real-life example could be a child who enjoys organizing toy cars by color. They may sit beside another child, arranging puzzles. While no direct interaction occurs, the proximity helps build familiarity and comfort with others.

Parallel play can also serve as a stepping stone for developing communication skills. For example, an autistic child might gradually begin to mimic a peer’s actions, such as stacking blocks in the same way.

This shared experience can open doors to nonverbal communication, such as shared glances or smiles.

Benefits of parallel play for autistic children

Parallel play has many benefits for autistic children and their development. Children are still aware of each other despite not directly interacting.

Being near peers can help autistic children become more comfortable in the same space, allowing for coexistence. Autistic children might feel more comfortable playing near their peers for many reasons. 

Play how they want

Many autistic children love structure or repetitive activities. Parallel play lets them stick to their routines without adjusting to how someone else might want to play.

For example, an autistic child might sit near a peer playing with cars but focus on lining up their cars in a row instead of joining in on a pretend race. Both are playing, just in ways that feel right for them.

Play without pressure

Children engaged in parallel play observe how other children play and their social interaction without the pressure to join. This observation helps them learn by imitation. 

For example, they might see another child stacking blocks in a specific way or using a toy creatively and then decide to try it themselves. They might see another peer pretending to be a superhero and then, inspired by that, do the same. 

Imagination helps with creativity and aids in cognitive growth as they learn to think beyond the concrete and into the abstract. Imitating peers in this way helps them practice new skills without the pressure of interacting socially.

Social engagement

Because social communication can be difficult for autistic children, they may feel less pressure to pick up on social cues when they parallel play.

They might observe how others use verbal and nonverbal communication, such as gestures, facial expressions, or body language.

For example, if one child asks for a toy and the other hands it over, the child watching sees how simple communication works in play. They might start to imitate this later on when they feel more confident.

Group dynamics

Parallel play can help support the understanding of group dynamics. By watching how groups of children play together, an autistic child can begin to understand the flow of social interaction. 

For example, they might see a group of kids working together to build blocks or engage in pretend play. Even though they’re not directly involved, they’re still absorbing those social patterns. 

Imagine an autistic child quietly stacking blocks while other kids play nearby with a toy kitchen set. The child watches as one child pretends to cook and another “orders food.”

Even though they’re not directly playing with the group, they’re observing how the pretend play works, how their peers communicate, and how everyone takes turns. 

Parallel play creates a safe environment for children with autism to observe social scenarios in a way that feels less overwhelming. Over time, these observations can lead to real growth in social skills and confidence.

Confidence building

Parallel play allows children to explore at their own pace, helping them build confidence in their unique abilities and strengths.

It gives autistic children the freedom to engage in activities that interest them without having to follow someone else’s rules or expectations.

This independence allows them to explore their toys, materials, or surroundings uniquely, sparking creativity. 

For example, while playing with blocks, a child might build a structure entirely based on their imagination, experimenting with different shapes and designs.

Skill development

Parallel play can assist with the development of specific skills. It can also support language development. Autistic children may observe their peers name items and engage in back-and-forth verbal interaction. 

Playing side-by-side can also help executive function. The autistic child can observe how other children approach tasks and solve problems. 

If a peer builds a structure with blocks, the autistic child might notice how they plan the base and stack the blocks in a particular order.

The autistic child can learn important planning and problem-solving strategies simply by observing, which can help improve their executive function skills over time. 

Even if they aren’t participating in activities, an autistic child can observe skills such as turn-taking. For example, if one child plays with a ball and then hands it to another, the autistic child watching may learn about turn-taking.

This can eventually help them feel more comfortable joining in when ready. 

Sensory regulation

In social situations, especially during play, a lot can go on—sounds, movement, touch, and even social demands that can feel overwhelming. 

Sensory sensitivities can impact play preferences. For example, parallel play may allow an autistic child to enjoy being near their peers but with less exposure to noise and movement.

By playing independently, children with autism can avoid sensory overload from too much noise, physical touch, or unpredictable movement. 

For instance, a child might stack blocks quietly rather than participate in a noisy game of tag. This helps them stay calm because they are not simultaneously bombarded with too many stimuli.

When children with autism have control over their sensory input, they’re less likely to become overwhelmed, which helps them stay more emotionally regulated.

Regulating emotions

Parallel play allows children to engage in preferred activities while being near others. Feeling in control helps them manage their emotions better, reducing the likelihood of outbursts or shutdowns. 

Imagine an autistic child sitting on the floor, quietly creating a base out of blocks while a group of kids nearby is building a fort.

The group’s activity is a little too loud and chaotic, but the child with ASD can stay regulated by engaging in their own soothing activity. They get to be part of the social environment while managing their own needs.

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An autistic child might be at a playground where other kids run and play tag. The child may want to play one game of tag and then sit in the sandbox alone, digging and building.

This allows them to enjoy the space and watch the other children play without being forced into a high-energy game that might overwhelm them. 

The autistic child can still be part of the group with more autonomy, allowing calmer, less anxious, and more managed emotions and actions. Minimizing overstimulation makes them more likely to feel secure and confident in social settings.

How do you encourage parallel play in autistic children?

Parents and educators can support and encourage parallel play for autistic children. A parent can engage in similar activities near their child, like blocks or drawing, and their child can observe how to enjoy playtime while being near others. 

Educators can offer a sensory-friendly space with preferred toys and activities. Ensuring the play space is comfortable and not too overwhelming allows the autistic student to engage in parallel play without sensory overload. 

Slowly introducing an autistic child to peers in a relaxed setting, like inviting a peer with a similar interest for a short playdate, can be helpful. Let them play near each other, but don’t pressure the autistic child to interact directly. 

Over time, they’ll feel more comfortable having others in closer proximity. Once a child is comfortable with parallel play, gently encourage more interaction by suggesting simple ways to engage with their peers. 

Suggest handing a block to a peer or commenting on their creation. Keep the interactions small and manageable so the autistic child doesn’t feel overwhelmed. 

Remember to celebrate all progress, whether it’s simply observing others or starting to share space more comfortably.

Transitioning from parallel play to interactive play

The shift from parallel to interactive play is a natural part of many children’s developmental journey, including for autistic children. This transition often occurs when a child feels secure in their environment and begins to show interest in others’ activities.

Signs might include:

• mimicking a peer’s actions, 
• sharing toys, or 
• making eye contact during play.

Parents can gently support this transition by introducing cooperative activities that incorporate shared goals. For example, they could suggest building a block tower together or taking turns in a simple game.

It’s important to follow the child’s lead and avoid imposing expectations, as this can create stress or resistance.

How does parallel play manifest in autistic adults?

Parallel play isn’t exclusive to childhood and can manifest in autistic adults through shared hobbies or activities. For example, two adults might enjoy knitting side-by-side, playing video games in the same room, or working on separate art projects at a shared table.

This form of engagement allows for companionship without the demands of direct interaction, aligning with many autistic individuals’ social preferences.

Respecting these preferences is essential. For example, a group of friends who gather to paint together might find joy in the shared experience without needing constant conversation. This dynamic fosters connection while honoring the need for personal space.

Another example may be a book club where members read silently together and discuss only if they choose. By accommodating diverse social needs, these activities provide opportunities for bonding in ways that feel authentic and comfortable.

Supporting autism parallel play: A path to social growth

Encouraging and providing opportunities for parallel play creates a supportive environment. Here, autistic children can grow socially, cognitively, and emotionally in a safe, manageable way while laying the groundwork for more interactive play in the future.

FAQs

Q: Is parallel play common in autism?

A: Yes, parallel play is common in autism as it allows children to engage in activities alongside peers without requiring direct interaction. This can provide comfort and opportunities for observation and learning in a less overwhelming social setting.

Q: How do autistic children typically play?

A: Autistic children often engage in repetitive, sensory, or solitary play, focusing on specific interests or activities. They may prefer structured routines and might struggle with imaginative or cooperative play involving peers.

Q: At what age is parallel play normal?

A: Parallel play is normal between the ages of 2 and 3 years as part of typical developmental stages. It serves as a foundation for social interaction skills that develop later.

Q: At what age is autism first noticed?

A: Autism is often noticed between 12 and 24 months of age, as delays in communication, social interaction, and behavior become apparent. Early signs can include a lack of eye contact, limited response to their name, or repetitive behaviors.