Autistic dysregulation, often referred to as emotional dysregulation in the context of autism, involves difficulty identifying, expressing, and managing emotional responses to everyday situations.
Emotional dysregulation may manifest as intense emotional reactions to seemingly minor stressors, behaviors of concern, and difficulty returning to a calm state after being upset.
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Examples of emotional dysregulation
Emotional dysregulation manifests differently across stages of life, including childhood, adolescence, and adulthood. Here are some examples:
- A 4-year-old with multiple developmental challenges becomes emotionally dysregulated outside the home, triggered by crowded environments, long outings, and strangers approaching. When upset, she may scream and engage in self-harm.
- A 15-year-old with autism, intellectual disability, and epilepsy experiences emotional dysregulation at home. Triggers include routine changes, losing comfort objects, pressure to do self-care, and sibling rivalry. This leads to verbal and physical aggression.
- A 23-year-old with autism, ADHD, anxiety, and depression withdraws from social interactions after years of bullying. She now avoids leaving the house, relying on technology as an escape, and spends most of her time isolated in her room.
Signs of emotional dysregulation in autism
The examples above highlight how the core challenges often remain similar across ages – difficulty identifying, expressing, and managing emotions. However, the specific ways these difficulties present can vary with age and life circumstances.
Below is a list of common signs of emotional dysregulation in autism:
1. Intense emotional reactions
An autistic person may show sudden, overwhelming responses that are disproportionate to the situation. They may have strong emotional reactions to minor changes in routine, unexpected events, or sensory stimuli (e.g., loud noises or bright lights).
These intense emotions can lead to meltdowns, where they might cry, yell, or act out aggressively.
2. Difficulty returning to baseline
The individual may struggle to calm down or recover from an emotional outburst. The inability to quickly return to a calm state may lead to extended periods of:
- dysregulation,
- withdrawal, or
- shutdowns (a form of emotional withdrawal where the person becomes non-responsive).
3. Mood swings
Rapid and unpredictable mood changes, such as shifting from calm to angry or sad with little provocation, can lead to rapid mood shifts. Small frustrations (e.g., difficulty with communication or unmet expectations) can also cause this.
For example, an autistic individual might go from being content to upset within moments due to sensory overload or social misunderstanding.
4. Meltdowns
Autism meltdowns are often shown as uncontrollable and intense emotional outbursts, including screaming, crying, or aggression. They may occur when an autistic person becomes overwhelmed by emotions, sensory input, or frustration.
These feelings may present as hitting, kicking, or self-injurious behaviors (e.g., headbanging). The individual may struggle to stop the meltdown until they are fully calm.
5. Shutdowns
Shutdowns are emotional withdrawals where the person becomes non-responsive or disengaged.
In response to emotional overwhelm, instead of acting out, an autistic person might “shut down” by becoming silent, unresponsive, or retreating to a quiet space.
During a shutdown, the individual may avoid eye contact, speech, or interaction and may need time alone to recover.
6. Anxiety and irritability
Persistent feelings of anxiety, worry, or irritability are often triggered by perceived stress or unpredictable changes. Autistic people may experience heightened anxiety in situations that involve uncertainty or social demands.
This anxiety can manifest as restlessness, agitation, or a need to engage in repetitive behaviors (stimming) to manage the discomfort. Irritability can surface when their routines are disrupted or sensory inputs become overwhelming.
7. Difficulty identifying and expressing emotions
Many autistic individuals experience alexithymia, meaning they may have trouble labeling their emotions (e.g., not knowing whether they feel anxious or angry).
This can result in frustration or confusion, contributing to dysregulation, as they cannot articulate what they are feeling or why.
8. Avoidance and withdrawal
Autistic people may avoid certain environments or social interactions that cause sensory or emotional stress. This can be seen in a child refusing to leave the house or an adult avoiding social events.
Withdrawal might involve isolating themselves or spending extended time on a special interest or technology to self-regulate.
9. Repetitive or self-soothing behaviors (stimming)
To calm themselves, autistic individuals may engage in repetitive behaviors (stimming), such as hand-flapping, rocking, or repeating words.
These behaviors help provide comfort and stability in the face of overwhelming emotions or sensory input.
10. Impulsive reactions
In moments of emotional distress, autistic individuals might engage in impulsive behaviors, such as hitting, running away, or making loud noises. This may be their way of trying to release intense emotions or manage sensory overload.
11. Difficulty managing transitions
Autistic individuals, especially children, may find transitions (e.g., leaving the house, ending playtime) extremely difficult.
The emotional distress caused by these transitions may lead to meltdowns, shutdowns, or withdrawal as they struggle to adapt to the change.
12. Sensory overload
Sensory sensitivities, like lights, sounds, or textures, can overwhelm autistic individuals and trigger emotional dysregulation.
For example, loud noises, bright lights, or uncomfortable textures might lead to immediate emotional reactions such as covering ears, closing eyes, or retreating from the environment.
The impact of emotional dysregulation
As highlighted in the points listed above, when an individual is overwhelmed by their emotion, they may react in challenging ways that can have a negative physical, psychological, and emotional impact on them and the people involved.
Challenging behaviors can seriously limit or delay an individual’s access to certain activities, services, and experiences. This can interfere with their social relationships, academic achievement, employment, and inclusion in different settings, impacting their ability to reach their full potential.
Managing emotional dysregulation in autism
Handling emotional dysregulation in autism can be approached with a combination of proactive strategies, supportive environments, and therapeutic interventions that systematically teach emotional regulation skills.
Various resources are available to teach emotional regulation skills. Some tools, like workbooks and apps, can help autistic individuals of all ages learn to identify, express, and manage their emotions in a healthy and socially acceptable way.
Parents, educators, and professionals can also use these resources to support emotional regulation coaching.
Emotional dysregulation in autistic adults
Emotional dysregulation in autistic adults often presents unique challenges, particularly in navigating work, relationships, and daily responsibilities.
Triggers such as sensory overload, workplace stress, and unexpected changes in routine can lead to heightened emotions, making it difficult to respond appropriately in social or professional settings.
Unlike children, adults are often expected to manage these emotions independently, which can increase pressure and anxiety. Emotional outbursts, shutdowns, or even social withdrawal can occur when emotions become too overwhelming to control, affecting their ability to maintain employment or personal relationships.
For autistic adults, managing emotional dysregulation requires tailored approaches. Many find success using techniques such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) to reframe emotional triggers or practicing mindfulness to manage stress.
Workplace accommodations, such as flexible hours or sensory-friendly environments, can also be critical.
Building a strong support network (therapy, support groups, or understanding family members) allows autistic adults to express emotions in a safe space and receive the guidance they need.
Navigating the path to emotional balance
Remember that it’s never too late to help the individual you support develop crucial emotional regulation skills. Our emotions and reactions are not set in concrete. We have a choice about how we think and react to challenging situations.
There is a space between any event and a response. In that space is our power to choose our emotional response. Empowering individuals with emotional regulation skills will enhance their quality of life, leading to positive outcomes for all.
FAQs
Q: Why do autistic people struggle with emotions?
A: Autistic individuals often face unique challenges when it comes to emotions due to a combination of neurological, sensory, and social factors.
Q: What does autistic dysregulation look like?
A: Autistic individuals may struggle with emotions due to a variety of factors, including neurological differences, sensory sensitivities, difficulties with emotional awareness (alexithymia), challenges in social communication, heightened emotional sensitivity, and co-occurring conditions like anxiety or ADHD.
Q: How do you handle emotional dysregulation in autism?
A: Emotional dysregulation in autism can be addressed with a combination of proactive strategies, supportive environments, and therapeutic interventions.
Q: How does autism affect emotional processing?
A: Autism affects emotional processing in several unique ways. Due to differences in neurological functioning, individuals on the autism spectrum may experience and express emotions differently.
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