For a person who is an introvert, the thought of being the center of attention can be overwhelming at best. But if you are getting married, a day where there is going to be a lot of fanfare about you, then it can be even more daunting.
As we all know, weddings are grand occasions where the bridal couple are the center of attention, but if you are an introverted couple, being social for an extended period can be your undoing, and the last thing you need is for the best day of your life being dampened because your social battery ran out.
That being said, your wedding day is all about you and your loved one, which means that it is perfectly okay to have an intimate ceremony with the people closest to you, sans the large celebrations.
Being an introvert in a social setting requires a lot of mental exertion to do or say the right things. It can feel like a lot of pressure, as we feel the need to push ourselves to be sociable and engaging with those around us. If not, you may be on the receiving end of comments about why you look angry all the time, or why you are so quiet.
When you’re battery has run its course, you feel cranky, overwhelmed, and want to be alone. There is also a lot of overthinking and guilt once your battery is depleted. You feel a lot calmer when you are done with social interactions.
Before we move on, it is important to note that many people tend to use introvert and socially anxious interchangeably. While they both can exist in a person at the same time, they are fundamentally different.
Socially anxious people have all the traits of an introvert, however, they’re always anxious about getting involved in any activity that requires them to be social. The before, during, and after is fraught with overthinking and nervousness that can sometimes induce panic attacks. It is important to mention that social anxiety is a mental health condition that can be managed, but some people may require medical intervention to function.
The question has been popped and now it is time to plan the big day. These tips will help you navigate creating an intimate ceremony that’s perfect for an introvert.
1. Talk with your partner
Before you begin the actual planning, it is important to sit down with your partner and discuss all the details to make sure that you are both on the same page regarding expectations of this intimate event. This discussion should include everything from the number of guests, location, pre-wedding events, and more. You both need to align your needs and wants and be willing to make compromises. This is a crucial time to set certain boundaries that you feel are important to making this day special and memorable for you both.
2. Be prepared for several events
Unfortunately, weddings are just not one day of social gatherings. As a prelude to the wedding, there is the engagement party, bachelor party, bridal shower, and rehearsal dinner. People of different faiths even have several rituals to perform in the days leading up to the wedding. These events need to be kept in mind, as they center around you and your partner. Sometimes it can even serve as a test-run of you being the center of attention on your wedding day.
3. Curate your wedding list
Once you and your partner decide on a designated number of guests for the wedding, you need to think long and hard about the people you want to invite to share this day with. It will not be easy to narrow down the list. But if you feel as though you will be stressed by people who are not in your close circle then you can absolutely omit them from the list. This list is for the people who you trust, and whose company you enjoy without feeling overwhelmed.
4. Choosing a venue
Once you have your guest list numbers decided, the next step would be to find a venue that is small and beautiful. If you want to, you can have a small destination wedding in Los Angeles that has a quaint and open-air setting, a small restaurant, or a rooftop cafe as a venue for your event.
5. Consider separating the actual ceremony and reception
This has two possibilities for you as the bridal couple. Having the two parts of the events separated, you can give yourself a moment to regain your energy before getting back into the spotlight for the second part of the day. If you want to recite your vows privately with the witnesses, and afterward celebrate with the guests, then this would be a great way to do so.
6. Make decor casual
The formalness of a wedding can feel overwhelming, you can switch up this mood by making the decor and setting more casual. One option would be to have a cocktail night instead of a sit-down dinner. Alternatively, you can have couches in the reception area for people to mingle with ease. It will help put you and the guests at ease and feel relaxed as well.
7. Include entertainment
The best way to remove the attention from you is to direct it elsewhere. If you want to forgo the speeches and other formalities, you can hire entertainers such as dancers or a band for the reception. Other entertainment ideas include a quirky photobooth or a snack station.
8. Have a point of contact
For your wedding, have someone who will be able to assist with directing people and delegating tasks so it won’t be left to you. All communication and questions can be filtered through this person, and it will take the stress off you.
9. Schedule regular breaks
Remember to allocate time during your wedding for you to take a moment to gather yourself and recharge before having to go out and be engaging again. This will help prevent you from getting overwhelmed and irritable on your big day.
10. Practice for the event
This will help make the day more bearable. This can be during the rehearsal dinner or in a more casual setting. It will help you get used to the idea of all eyes being on you without getting overwhelmed.
At the best of times, social events are bearable for introverts, but an event where all focus is on the introvert can be daunting. That is what can be expected at your wedding. However, as weddings are all about the bridal couple, an intimate and low-key ceremony can still be the perfect and most memorable day of your life.
