Including children in household tasks can be difficult. Sometimes, it seems like it slows down the process, and other times, you have to rev your child up so they are willing to participate.
Getting children to play an active role around the house can sometimes feel like pulling teeth. However, the advantage of including children in these household jobs is that they improve self-esteem and increase their motivation to be independent thinkers and self-sufficient workers.
Pair those skills with precise schedules, and parents may find their child more willing to help around the house. To make chores a stress-free and educational activity, I’ve outlined some tips below.
If you’d like to learn more about how you can motivate your autistic child to do chores, you can download your free guide here:
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Sure Fire Ways to Get Your Child with ASD to do Chores
1. Give your child something to look forward to
Incentives are always helpful in encouraging a child’s productivity. Try scheduling chores on weekends or earlier in the afternoon when they are learning at home for hybrid schooling.
If you schedule chores too close to bedtime, there won’t be time for a reward afterward – especially if that treat is a sugary one! If your child knows something fun will follow – a TV show, a snack, a play date, or a favorite activity – they may feel motivated to complete a task to enjoy the following reward.
2. Find a way to make chores fun
Your child will sooner respond to something fun rather than tedious. Try turning the task into some kind of game.
You might ascribe points to the chore: perhaps for each dish that’s washed or each toy picked up, your child gets one point, one gold star, or some other reward.
When your child hits 10 points, perhaps they get a prize. Make the activity something your child will most enjoy, and have fun together.
3. Encourage everyone to help
Mom, dad, sister, brother – it’s important that your child sees that everyone plays a role in taking care of the house. This will make them feel included and also motivate them to participate.
By setting a good example and normalizing housework, children won’t want to be left out or feel like they aren’t contributing in some way to keep things tidy and clean.
It helps if everyone sticks to a schedule or takes on the same task each time so there is clarity and consistency. If someone can’t participate, make sure to explain that to your child.
4. Offer encouragement and surprise gifts
Housework can sometimes be tense work: cleaning up after a big mess can lead to stress or frustration. Take a breath. A new system or schedule will necessitate a learning period for everyone involved. That’s why it’s important to practice patience and keep an open mind.
It’s also important to encourage your child. Verbally affirm when they are working collaboratively. If there is confusion, offer a social story so children know what to expect.
Although you may already have incentives built into your system, sometimes offering a surprise gift to thank your child and letting them know their work is appreciated is okay. We all want our efforts to be seen and respected!
5. Make larger tasks feel simpler
Take the time to break the task into steps for new or complex projects. For example, do not just tell your child: “Do the dishes, please.” They might not know in what order to do them, where to place them, what soap to use, etc.
Never assume; always discuss. Smaller, accomplishable steps set children up for success and prevent them from becoming overwhelmed.
6. Work together
Certain chores will be new to your child, so it can be a big help if you do those with your child the first few times. Walk through what your process will be: perhaps you will do it with them a few times, and the next time, you can observe and be present for questions. Finally, your child may accomplish the chore on their own.
This also shows that you value the task at hand. When children with autism participate in household chores, they feel useful. It builds their self-esteem and establishes lifelong skills needed for independence.
7. Make a calendar
Scheduling “chore day” will put it on your child’s radar and avoid any surprises that may upset them. Set up a colorful chore wheel or a schedule they can access in their room so they know when and what to anticipate.
Try spacing the chores out over a day or two so they don’t get overwhelmed trying to accomplish too much – especially when chores are a new addition to their schedule.
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8. Play music while cleaning
Sometimes, if children associate something “un-fun” like cleaning with something enjoyable like music, they might be more willing to participate. What creative techniques can you employ to make chores more entertaining?
Try playing their favorite audiobook, singing songs, or whatever else makes them happy and engaged. Dance while you mop, sing while you sweep!
FAQs
Q: How do I get my autistic child to do chores?
A: Use clear, simple instructions and create a visual schedule to help your child understand and remember their chores. Positive reinforcement and consistent routines can also motivate them to complete tasks.
Q: How can you encourage children with autism to participate in activities?
A: Find activities that align with their interests and sensory preferences and gradually introduce them to new experiences in a supportive environment. Use positive reinforcement and create a structured, predictable routine to help them feel comfortable and engaged.
Q: How can you get an autistic child to tidy up?
A: Break the task into small, manageable steps and use visual aids or checklists to guide them through the process. Offering praise and rewards for completing each step can encourage and motivate them to tidy up.
Q: What do kids with autism like to play with?
A: Children with autism often enjoy sensory toys, such as fidget spinners, textured balls, and weighted blankets, as well as activities that involve repetition and structure, like puzzles and building blocks. They may also have specific interests in certain topics or objects that can guide their play preferences.
